Using self talk for positive outcomes
With sweat running down your face and pain in your body, a voice enters your head “You have to stop now, I need to recover”, or the entrepreneur is finishing a sales pitch and a moment of doubt enters his mind, so instead of looking into a client’s eyes you choose to look at their clothes. These are the subtle and obvious examples of how self-sabotage the outcome impacts the self-confidence of the action and goal but over time also impacts your win rate, success rate and levels of satisfaction.
One of the most common tools within self-improvement is positive self-talk, yet it takes time to replace the negative self-talk first. Just like the training for a marathon or sales pitches, it takes time to perfect and hurdles arise at unexpected moments.
The key balance is to not over analyze our state of mind. You see, the more you think about avoiding negative thoughts, the more likely they will pop up and impact your positive flow of thought. So, how do you manage the dilemma?
1) Use critical thinking skills to question your actions objectively.
2) Avoid procrastination, better to have a slightly unrealistic to-do list of positive steps than leave time for negative disruptions in your day.
3) Whilst working on tasks, know how and when to pick them back up faster the next time to move milestones forward.
4) Keep a daily “top up” of positive motivators such as mindfulness, gratitude and affirmation techniques.
5) Beware that failure and setbacks are the best areas of learning so ignore what you THINK others might think of you.
6) Before assuming other people’s wins are bigger and more deserved than your own, look closer at the details and apply any learning to your own process.
7) Allowing others to put you down and give unfair criticism.
8) Avoid worrying about issues outside of your control. Control yourself and make yourself accountable.
9) Review your emotional responses to social posts and your daily interactions. Identify if your initial response is anger or jealousy.
Your past is not your future.
A common reason for self-sabotage behavior is sourced from a prior record of failure. Accepting expected outcomes reinforces the likelihood of the same results. A key step in winning understands that what you do now and how you perform right now is more important than any prior results or outcomes in the past.
There are many turn around examples on YouTube, Hollywood and Art Galleries and Stock Exchanges to discover people and organizations that have terrible historical results yet learn from their mistakes and apply solid future performance focus to attain wins at global levels.
To reinforce this attitude, perform a quick self-check using the following types of questions.
1) List 3 positive lessons over the past 7 days
2) What 2 alternative methods are there if all resources could be made available?
3) How far from your last miles stone are you and how much further do you need to reach the next one?
In the moment of doubt
This article and others can list some tips, highlights and strategies but it is you the reader that needs to apply them. So let us make an agreement right here and now. I, James Doyle – CEO of JAMSO believe that you ARE capable of more than what you think during those moments of self-doubt. I know that you can be better, learn the skills needed and can be fully deserving to win.
Let me know in the comments below your own experiences and how this has helped you.